Welcome aboard to a rollicking ride of railway rib-ticklers! Our journey will take you through tunnels of laughter and stations of joy. From tracks to cabooses, steam engines to commuters, these train jokes cover all aspects of the rail system. We promise they’re all in good fun and definitely on the right track!
So whether you’re a train enthusiast or just a fan of a good chuckle, get ready to have a laugh with 50 uniquely hilarious train-themed jokes. All aboard the laughter express!
- Why don’t trains ever go to tennis games?
Because they’re afraid of love-love tracks! - Why did the train take the gum to school?
Because it wanted to go chew-chew! - How do trains eat?
They choo on their food! - Why did the train apply for a job?
It was tired of freeloading! - How do trains hear?
They have engine-ears! - Why was the little train crying?
Because it had gone off the rails! - Why did the train carry bubble gum?
Because it wanted to go “Choo-Choo!” - What do you call a train that sneezes?
A-choo-choo train! - What do you give a train driver for his birthday?
Platform shoes! - Why was the train always late?
It had too much loco-motion!
READ MORE: Best 100 Train Jokes, Railway Puns & Funny Laws - Why did the train sit on the baby’s pram?
It wanted to be a cradle-robber! - Why was the steam engine so boastful?
It couldn’t stop blowing its own whistle! - What do you call a train full of toffee?
A chew-chew train! - Why don’t trains ever get lost?
Because they always follow the tracks! - Why don’t trains use social media?
They can’t handle the feed-back! - Why did the train get in trouble?
It had bad track records! - Why was the train so good at hide and seek?
Because it always stayed on track! - Why was the train wearing a disguise?
Because it didn’t want to be recognized by the station! - Why did the train carry a notebook?
Because it wanted to keep a log of its journey! - What do trains wear to sleep?
Their track-suits! - Why do trains get a lot of laughs?
Because their jokes have great delivery! - Why did the train go to the party?
Because it was a caboose loose! - Why did the train bring a suitcase?
It was getting ready for some ‘track’ and field! - Why did the steam train stop working?
It lost its steam! - Why don’t trains make good musicians?
They have a one-track mind! - Why did the train break up with its partner?
Because it felt like they were going down different tracks! - What do you call a very quiet train?
A shush-shush train! - How do trains write secret messages?
In crypted code! - Why did the train never get any Christmas presents?
Because it kept derailing Santa’s plans! - How does a train stay in shape?
It runs on a regular schedule! - Why do trains get good grades?
Because they always stay on track! - Why was the train always tired?
Because it had too many sleepers! - Why was the train good at basketball?
It had great track records! - Why did the train go to school?
To learn about the history of locomotives! - Why don’t trains ever play hide and seek?
Because they always follow the tracks! - What’s a train’s favorite clothing?
Its conductor’s suit! - Why did the train go to the hospital?
Because it had a severe case of locomotive dysfunction! - What do you call a train that writes poetry?
An express-ion train! - How does a train propose?
“Will you be my track for life?” - Why was the train good at meditation?
It always stayed in the present station! - What do trains do when they’re annoyed?
They let off steam! - Why was the train a good musician?
It had great tracks! - What do you call a train that talks a lot?
A chatter train! - Why are trains always calm?
They always go with the flow of the tracks! - Why did the train go on a diet?
It was tired of hauling extra freight! - How do trains get their morning caffeine?
They take a coffee at the next station! - What’s a train’s favorite band?
Train! - How do trains communicate?
They whistle! - Why was the train feeling so low?
It lost its steam! - Why did the train win the race?
Because it was on the right track!
We’ve now reached the end of our laughter-filled journey, and we hope these 50 train-themed jokes have left you chugging with laughter! Remember, no matter where life takes you, always stay on track and keep the fun rolling like a runaway train. We hope these jokes have fueled your joy ride and added a sparkle of amusement to your day. Stay tuned for our next comedy express! Thanks for joining us on this fun trip. Until next time, keep laughing and keep chugging along!
